The Value of Having a Trusted Financial Adviser When a Spouse Is at Death’s Door
When both partners have a relationship with a family adviser, the transition after the death of a spouse can be far less painful. Here’s why.

Some couples don’t need a financial adviser. That’s because one of the partners has the desire, time and expertise to do the work that other couples (and individuals) outsource to professionals.
Yet in my 25 years of experience as a financial adviser, it’s been rare that I’ve encountered a scenario where both partners each could handle the family’s finances without the assistance of a professional.
In most mature marriages today (people over the age of 50), regardless of which spouse pays the bills, it is still usually the husband who makes the investment decisions.

Sign up for Kiplinger’s Free E-Newsletters
Profit and prosper with the best of expert advice on investing, taxes, retirement, personal finance and more - straight to your e-mail.
Profit and prosper with the best of expert advice - straight to your e-mail.
Yet the reality is that, in most marriages, the husband will die before the wife.
So what happens to the widow (or the husband) who is left to deal with the financial matters? If she was the one who handled the affairs, or at least took part in the process, she’ll probably do just fine. But if she relied upon her husband to manage the investments, she’ll probably have to find a financial adviser to assist her – precisely at a time in life when everything seems uncertain.
I’ve noticed during my career that, for those couples who both have a relationship with the family financial adviser, the surviving spouse handles this incredibly difficult transition with much less stress than those people who have no relationship with an adviser. That’s because they don’t have to worry as much about their finances because they know they have someone who has their interests at heart.
If you are married and you manage your family’s finances, ask yourself the following question: “How would my spouse go about managing our investments if I were to die”?
If you have a high degree of confidence that your spouse could continue managing things on her (or his) own, that’s excellent! But, if not, you really ought to take some steps to prepare for the inevitable.
There are two things you should do: First, try to involve your spouse with the process. Talk with her (or him) about the decisions you are making and seek her (or his) involvement in selecting the investments.
If you find your spouse is receptive and truly interested in learning how to take care of the family’s portfolio, without the help of an adviser, great. But if not, consider what many others in your situation have done – develop a relationship with a financial adviser as soon as possible.We’ve had many people come to us over the years who became clients of the firm for the sole purpose of taking care of their spouse. They realize that if they can introduce their spouse to an adviser beforehand, and spend the time with the adviser so that their spouse knows and trusts that person, it will be one less thing their spouse will need to deal with when they pass away.
The benefit to the spouse is that she (or he) has someone to lean on during the immediate aftermath, as well as the years ahead.So if you are a person who takes pride in doing a fine job managing the investments, stop and think what it might be like for your spouse if you were gone. You might consider it worthwhile to find an adviser your spouse can trust well before you are gone so that she (or he) can feel confident about their finances in the event of your demise.
Scott Hanson, CFP, answers your questions on a variety of topics and also co-hosts a weekly call-in radio program. Visit MoneyMatters.com to ask a question or to hear his show. Follow him on Twitter at @scotthansoncfp.
Get Kiplinger Today newsletter — free
Profit and prosper with the best of Kiplinger's advice on investing, taxes, retirement, personal finance and much more. Delivered daily. Enter your email in the box and click Sign Me Up.
Scott Hanson, CFP, answers your questions on a variety of topics and also co-hosts a weekly call-in radio program. Visit HansonMcClain.com to ask a question or to hear his show. Follow him on Twitter at @scotthansoncfp.
-
RMD Deadline April 1: Five Tax Strategies to Manage Your 2025 Income
Taxable Income The April 1, 2025, deadline for required minimum distributions (RMDs) is fast approaching for retirees who turned 73 in 2024.
By Kelley R. Taylor Published
-
Rising AI Demand Stokes Undersea Investments
The Kiplinger Letter As demand soars for AI, there’s a need to transport huge amounts of data across oceans. Tech giants have big plans for new submarine cables, including the longest ever.
By John Miley Published
-
The Three Biggest Fears Keeping Retirees Up at Night
Here are the steps you can take to put those fears to rest and retire with confidence so you can relax and enjoy the life you've planned.
By Pam Krueger Published
-
What Can a Donor-Advised Fund Do for You? (A Lot)
DAFs and private foundations go about helping charities (and those who donate) in different ways. Each comes with its own benefits and restrictions to navigate.
By Julia Chu Published
-
Estate Planning When You Have International Assets
Estate planning gets tricky when you have assets and/or beneficiaries outside the U.S. To avoid costly inheritance mistakes, it pays to understand the basics.
By Kelsey M. Simasko, Esq. Published
-
Three Essential Estate Planning Steps to Protect Your Nest Egg
After dedicating years to building your wealth and securing your future, make sure your assets are protected and your loved ones are provided for in the future.
By Nicole Farbo, CFP® Published
-
Is Chasing the American Dream Ruining Your Financial Life?
Too many people focus on visible affluence as a marker of success. Here's how to avoid succumbing to the pressure and driving yourself into debt.
By Anthony Martin Published
-
Retiring With a Pension? Four Things to Know
The road to a secure retirement is slightly more intricate for people with pensions. Here are four key issues to consider to make the most out of yours.
By Joe F. Schmitz Jr., CFP®, ChFC® Published
-
How to Teach Your Kids About the Tax Facts of Life
Taxes are unavoidable, so it's important to teach children what to expect. Also, does your child need to file a tax return for 2024? Find out here.
By Neale Godfrey, Financial Literacy Expert Published
-
Revocable Living Trusts: The Good, the Bad and the Ugly
People are conditioned to believe they should avoid probate at all costs, but when compared with living trusts, probate could be a smart choice for some folks.
By Charles A. Borek, JD, MBA, CPA Published