College Grads: This Is What Hiring Managers Are Thinking (But Won't Admit)
Hiring managers share the attitudes, questions and other issues that run the risk of turning off an interviewer — and some of these things they would never admit if asked.


Recently, I was invited to speak about navigating etiquette and work culture at the 2025 California State University Bakersfield Career Conference hosted by SHRM (Society for Human Resource Management). I’ll be presenting alongside Dr. Luis Vega, a friend of this column and dean of Social Sciences and Education. I’d also like to give a shoutout to CSUB students Kimberly Mitchell and Sarah Varela for welcoming me to the conference.
When I asked several HR consultants and hiring managers from across the country for suggestions on what to tell students, the overwhelming response was: What comes first is getting hired. They all shared some of the things they might consider when interviewing prospective job candidates.
Repeatedly, I heard that the actions that will help or hinder an applicant from getting the job are often the same behaviors that lead to success or failure at work — getting along and being polite to one another, both of which go to the very heart of etiquette and work culture.

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On condition of anonymity, the HR professionals agreed to share with me how they size up job applicants, sometimes being quite blunt about the reality of job interviews today.
1. First impressions really do matter
Your tattoos, piercings and hairstyle can have an impact on whether a hiring manager will consider giving you a job. Depending on the role and the employee’s contact with customers, many employers do not care if you have visible tattoos as long as they are not offensive.
After attending Loyola University School of Law, H. Dennis Beaver joined California's Kern County District Attorney's Office, where he established a Consumer Fraud section. He is in the general practice of law and writes a syndicated newspaper column. "I love law for the reason that I can help people resolve their problems," he says. "I know it sounds corny, but I just love to be able to use my education and experience to help — simply to help. When a reader contacts me, it is a gift."
Every hiring manager I spoke with said they were turned off by certain piercings and inappropriate tattoos. They all said that if someone shows up with piercings (beyond the usual ear piercings), it is an automatic no.
Bottom line: If the job requires in-person contact with the public, the HR pros said employers will skip hiring someone whose appearance makes them seem unapproachable.
Also, if you show up to the job interview in, say, shorts and a T-shirt, you likely will not get hired. By taking care to dress professionally, you’re showing that you respect the interviewer and your potential employer.
Similarly, once you’re hired, if you will not respect company dress codes — for instance, insisting on dressing in an inappropriate way on the job — you will not stay employed. “Being yourself” is fine, but you still have to follow the rules.
2. Your actions during the interview are especially important
If you lack enthusiasm for the position you’re interviewing for or don’t thank the interviewer for seeing you, that can indicate you do not want to be there.
You should also be sure to ask the interviewer questions, such as:
- What do you like most about working here?
- What do you expect from a person in this position in the first 60 to 90 days?
This shows the hiring manager that you have a healthy dose of curiosity and will be able to communicate well with coworkers and management.
Maybe it shouldn’t even need to be said, but don’t talk back to the interviewer or give the impression that you think you’re running the interview.
Don’t say things like:
- Why are you asking me this? Don’t you need someone, anyone, right now?
- It’s just a receptionist position, so why do I need to have my tattoos covered?
- How I dress doesn’t matter — I’ll be behind a computer, so no one is going to see me.
You are correct: With that kind of attitude, no one will ever see you.
3. Your online presence gets a look
Through a Google search, some interviewers will become aware of information about you such as your political views, the church you attend, who you hang out with and other issues based on your photos, chats and videos.
Some states have strict rules against hiring managers accessing this information without signed consent from the applicant, but sometimes it happens anyway. If something disqualifying is discovered, the hiring manager should disclose it to the applicant and give them the opportunity to explain. Should does not mean that this process is definitely followed.
Depending on the job and risks to the employer, employees and the public, some hiring managers feel a background check should be required. What the applicant posts online is a gateway into their mindset.
4. Worth repeating: Your social media can work against you
Once you put something online, it is out there and stays there. Be sure that your profile is set to private, but it’d be better to simply not disclose your passion about social/political issues.
If it is something you might not want a future employer to see, don’t post it. Ask yourself, “How could this hurt me months or years down the road?”
Also, don’t share information about your club memberships or special interests. The professionals I talked with noted that that info might make a hiring manager think, “Now I am aware they are in a protected class or activity, and I am not taking chances.”
Good hiring managers won’t let that info affect their decisions, but it can and does happen.
5. Your actions before the interview matter, too
The people who are not part of the interview process can still provide valuable feedback to the hiring manager. How you treat, say, the person who arranges your travel to the interview can, and likely will, get back to the hiring manager.
If you’re a jerk to the person at Reception when you check in for the interview, they might tell the interviewer, “This guy was rude to me. I am not sure he would be a good fit here.”
6. Asking the following things can turn off hiring managers
- What’s the work-life balance? Instead of asking about this in your interview, research the company’s policies by visiting its website to find out if it offers such perks as flexible work hours and remote work. You can also read employees’ reviews about working at the company on sites like Glassdoor and Indeed.
- If I have obligations outside of work — family or personal — can I leave work early? Asking this tells the employer that you might have too many demands outside of work that could interfere with you getting your job done. It gives the impression that you are entitled and expect the employer to work around your needs.
Some final notes
The HR professionals noted that even if you do everything right in the job interview and have the skills to do the job, you might not get hired because of profiling. People are human and have biases. They might have had a personal experience with the applicant or someone whom the applicant reminds them of, leading them to feel that, because of their past experience, this person might not be a good fit. Fair? No. But it’s human nature, though good hiring managers will genuinely try not to let their biases affect their decisions.
Also, the HR professionals noted that most companies aren’t in the business of handholding. Once you’re hired, do not expect your employer to provide nurturing or wellness. Employers are not responsible for your happiness. If you’re not happy with your life in general, you should explore options outside of work to resolve those issues.
Each of the people I interviewed had similar closing advice for what to do in job interviews: You should focus on what you bring to the table — your knowledge, skills and ability.
Dennis Beaver practices law in Bakersfield, Calif., and welcomes comments and questions from readers, which may be faxed to (661) 323-7993, or e-mailed to Lagombeaver1@gmail.com. And be sure to visit dennisbeaver.com.
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After attending Loyola University School of Law, H. Dennis Beaver joined California's Kern County District Attorney's Office, where he established a Consumer Fraud section. He is in the general practice of law and writes a syndicated newspaper column, "You and the Law." Through his column, he offers readers in need of down-to-earth advice his help free of charge. "I know it sounds corny, but I just love to be able to use my education and experience to help, simply to help. When a reader contacts me, it is a gift."
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